Real Life In London

Chapter 91

~~202~~~ By this time they were arrived in Piccadilly, where they sat down to a cheerful refreshment, and proceeded to make arrangements for Merry well's departure: previous to this, however, Dashall and his Cousin had an engagement to keep with their Hibernian friends, of which particulars will appear in the next Chapter.

CHAPTER XX

All hail to the day of the tutelar Saint, Old George, not the King, but the Prince of brave fellows, And Champion of England, by Providence sent To slay a fierce Dragon as histories tell us!

And hail to the King of the first Isle on Earth, His fame with St. George and the Dragon who blending, Has chosen to celebrate this as his birth, The day of all others, good fortune portending.

Away then with Care, let us haste to the Park, Where Buckingham-house will exhibit a levy Resplendent in rank, youth and beauty;--and hark!

Hoa.r.s.e cannon announce both the birth-day and Levee.

Reverberate then, in each sea-port the roar!

And wave England's Standard on high, from each steeple, And skip from the oiling, each s.h.i.+p, to the sh.o.r.e, And joyfully dance on dry land with the people!{1}

1 That we may not be accused of plagiarism, we acknowledge ourselves indebted for the hyperbole contained in the last two lines of these introductory stanzas, to an original recommendation for a proper display of rapture, as contained in the following couplet by one Peter Ker, wherein he very humanely invites all the vessels belonging to Great Britain to strand themselves out of joy for the accession of James I.

"Let subjects sing, bells ring, and cannons roar, And every s.h.i.+p come dancing to the sh.o.r.e."

The morning of St. George's Day was ushered in, as the appointed anniversary of his Majesty's birth, by all the church-bells of the metropolis, the waving of the royal standard from the steeples, the display of the colours of all nations by the vessels in the Thames, and c.u.mberland mentions in his Memoirs, that when his father the Bishop revisited his estate in Ireland, an affectionate rustic hit upon an ingenious mode of shewing his happiness, by leaping from a tree, and breaking his leg! We do not find that any of his Majesty's loving subjects in the Park on St. George's Day followed the example of the Irish rustic!

[Ill.u.s.tration: page233.jpg St. George's Day]

Other manifestations of affection by a grateful people to the best of Sovereigns!--

"The sky was overcast, the morning lower'd, And heavily in clouds brought on the day."

~~264~~~ But despite of wind or wet, female curiosity must be gratified.

Miss Judith Macgilligan had some time previous to this auspicious day, expressed a desire to witness the gay and brilliant a.s.semblage of company in progress to the Levee, and Tom and Bob having gallantly volunteered their services on this important occasion, they now sallied forth, just as the Park and Tower guns were thundering the announcement of festivity, and joining Sir Felix O'Grady and his aunt at their lodgings, the party immediately moved onward to the scene of action.

Already had Royalty taken wing, and dignified with his presence the late maternal Palace, before our pedestrians reached the Park, to the great disappointment of Miss Macgilligan, who however consoled herself with the hope of being able to obtain a glimpse of monarchy as his Majesty pa.s.sed on his return to Carlton-house.

The Baronet in the meanwhile was in a reverie, which at last broke out in the following rhapsody:--

Oh! blest occasion of dispensing good, How seldom used, how little understood!-- To nurse with tender care the thriving arts, Watch every beam philosophy imparts: To give religion her unbridled scope, Nor judge by statute a believer's hope; With close fidelity and love unfeign'd, To keep the matrimonial bond unstain'd; Covetous only of a virtuous praise, His life a lesson to the land he sways.

Blest country where these kingly glories s.h.i.+ne!

Blest England, if this happiness be thine!

But,--

If smiling peeresses, and simp'ring peers, Encompa.s.sing his throne a few short years; If the gilt carriage and the pamper'd steed, That wants no driving and disdains the lead; If guards, mechanically form'd in ranks, Playing at beat of drum their martial pranks, Should'ring, and standing as if stuck to stone, While condescending majesty looks on;-- If monarchy consists in such base things, Sighing, I say again, I pity Kings.

~~265~~~ An immense number of splendid carriages now presented themselves to view, in continued and uninterrupted succession, stretching from the Horse Guards the whole length of the Mall, to Buckingham-house, where each setting down, and thence taking up a position in the Bird-cage Walk, they formed a circle of nearly two miles, and exhibited, in the magnificence of the vehicles, the admirable symmetry of the horses, and rich liveries of the attendants, a scene of interest, matchless perhaps by any other metropolis in the universe.

Skirting the indeterminable line of carriages, that slowly and under frequent stoppages proceeded to the goal of attraction, our party penetrated at last the dense ma.s.s of spectators, and gaining a favourable post of observation, took a position adjacent to Buckingham-house, where the band of music of the Foot Guards within, and that of the Horse Guards without the iron-railing circ.u.mscribing the palace, alternately enlivened the scene with "concord of sweet sounds."

But the great and general object of attention, was that of female loveliness, occupying almost every pa.s.sing vehicle. Dashall remarked, that he had never before been gratified with such an extensive and captivating display. Sir Felix and the Squire were in raptures, and even the primitive austerity of Miss Macgilligan yielded to the influence of beauty, and acknowledging its predominancy, she at same time observed, that its fascination was enhanced by the dress of the ladies, which, though splendid, exhibited genuine taste, and was more remarkable for its uniform adherence to modesty than she had hitherto seen it on any similar occasion.{1}

1 We are not fastidious, neither would we wish the charms of youth and beauty inaccessible to admiration; but certainly the dress, or rather undress of our fair countrywomen, has of late years bordered closely on nudity.--Female delicacy is powerfully attractive; we were glad to observe its predominancy at the last Levee, and we trust that it will gain universal prevalence.--Edit.

~~266~~~ Dashall,

To Sir Felix an encomium from a fair lady was ever irresistible.

He bowed, expressed a commensurate feeling of grat.i.tude for the honour conferred upon him, and professed himself an ardent admirer of the whole of women kind; concluding by humming a stanza from Burns,--

"Auld Nature swears the lovely dears Her n.o.blest work she cla.s.ses, O; Her 'prentice han' she tried on man, And then she made the la.s.ses, O."

Unluckily for the apophthegm of the Baronet, it so happened, that a quarrel took place in the immediate vicinity and hearing of the party, between two rival female fruiterers of the Emerald Isle; during which incivilities were exchanged in language not altogether acceptable to the auricular organs of delicacy. The brogue was that of Munster,--the war of words waged quicker and faster; and from invective the heroines seemed rapidly approximating to actual battle. Neither park-keeper nor constable were at hand; and although the surrounding mobility "laughed at the tumult and enjoyed the storm," Sir Felix, much distressed at so untoward an incident, and deeply interested in the honour of his country, so lately the theme of elegant panegyric, dashed through the crowd, the component parts of which he scattered aside like chaff, and arrested the further progress of the wranglers.

"Arrah, now, for the honour of Munster, be any, ye brats of the devil's own begetting!"

"Hear him! hear him! hear the umpire!" resounded from all quarters.

"May the devil make h.e.l.l-broth of ye both, in his own caldron!"

~~267~~~ The mirth of the mult.i.tude became now still more obstreperous, and Tom and Bob pushed forward to the a.s.sistance of their friend, who was in the act of keeping the two viragos apart from each other, having a hand on each, and holding them at arms length, alternately threatening and remonstrating, while the two nymphs, with frightful grimaces, struggled to elude his grasp, and abide the chance of war;--the scene altogether would have afforded ample scope for the pencil of an artist; and if not edifying, was at least to a numerous and motley a.s.semblage of spectators, highly entertaining. Sir Felix declined the a.s.sistance of his friends,--

"Never mind it," said he, "I'll settle the affair myself, my honies:" and slipping a half-crown piece into the hand of each of the amazons--"Now be off wid you," he whispered,--"lave the Park immediately;--away to the gin-shop;--shake hands wid each other in friends.h.i.+p; and drink good-luck to Sir Felix O'Grady."

With many expressions of grat.i.tude, the contending parties obeyed the mandate, and walked off lovingly together, cheek-by-jowl, as if no irruption of harmony had happened!

"Long life to him!" exclaimed a son of green Erin; "wid a word in the ear he has settled the business at once."

"And I pray," said a reverend looking gentleman in black, "that all conflicting powers may meet with like able mediation."

"Amen!" responded a fellow in the drawling nasil tone of a parish-clerk; and the congregation dispersed.

The tumult thus happily subdued, Sir Felix, with Tom and Bob, rejoined Miss Macgilligan and the group with whom she had been left in charge when the two latter gentlemen came to the Baronet's relief.

The "ardent admirer of the whole of women kind" sustained the jokes of the company with admirable equanimity of temper; and the same young lady who had eulogized his gallantry, now said that it was unfair, and what the Baronet could not possibly mean, to take his words in their literal acceptation; at the same time she highly commended his benevolent interference in the quarrel between the two women, and congratulated him on his address in bringing it to an amicable termination.

~~268~~~ Resuming their attention to the still continued line of company, Dashall and his friends remarked that pearls were a prominent part of female ornament at the present levee; particularly, he said, with the galaxy of Civic beauty from the East; for he had recognized so decorated, several elegantes, the wives and daughters of aldermen, bankers, merchants and others, of his City acquaintances.{1} A ponderous state carriage, carved and gilt in all directions, and the pannels richly emblazoned with heraldry, now came slowly up the Mall, and Sir Felix immediately announced the approach of the Lord Mayor of the City of London; but as the vehicle approximated nearer towards him, he became lost in a labyrinth of conjecture, on perceiving, that the pericranium of its princ.i.p.al inmate was enveloped in a wig of appalling dimensions; he now inquired whether the profundity of wisdom was denoted by the magnitude of a wig; and if so, why it was not worn by the Civic Sovereign rather on the seat of justice, where it might operate _in terrorem_ on delinquency, than on the happy occasion of his Majesty's anniversary; when Dashall unravelled the mystery, by acquainting the Baronet, that the personage whom he supposed to be the Lord Mayor of London, was the Lord High Chancellor of England.

1 By what curious links and fantastical relations are mankind connected together. At the distance of half the globe, a Hindoo gains his support by groping at the bottom of the sea for the morbid concretion of a sh.e.l.l-fish, to decorate the throat of a London alerman's wife! It is said that the great Linnaeus had discovered the secret of infecting oysters with this perligenous disease; what is become of the secret we know not, as the only interest tee take in oysters, is of a much more vulgar, though perhaps a more humane nature. Mr. Percival, in his Account of the Island of Ceylon, gives a very interesting account of the fishery, and of the Sea-dogs. "This animal is as fond of the legs of Hindoos, as Hindoos are of the pearls of oysters; and as one appet.i.te appears to him much more natural and less capricious' than the other, he never fails to indulge it."

~~269~~~ The company still poured along, numerous and diversified, beyond all former precedent; including all the n.o.bility in town, their ladies, daughters, et cetera; officers of the army and navy, grand crosses and knights companions of the most honourable order of the Bath; dignified sages and learned brethren of the law; and, "though last, not least in our esteem," the very right reverend Fathers in G.o.d, the Lords Bishops, in the costume of sacerdotal panoply; and amidst the fascination of female beauty, setting their affections on things above!{1}

1 Latimer, bishop of Worcester, speaking of the gentlemen of the black cloth, says,--"Well, I would all men would look to their dutie, as G.o.d hath called them, and then we should have a flourish-ing Christian common weale. And now I would ask a strange question. Who is the most diligentest bishop and prelate in all Englande, that pa.s.seth all the rest in doing his office? 1 can tell, for I know him who it is; I know him well. But now I think I see you listening and hearkening that I should name him. There is one that pa.s.seth all the other, and is the most diligent prelate and preacher in all Englande. And will you know who it is? I will tell you. It is the Devil! He is the most diligent preacher of all other; he is never out of his diocese; he is never from his cure; ye shall never fynde him unoccupyed; he is ever in his parish; he keepeth residence at all times; ye shall never fynde him out of the way; call for him when you will he is ever at home; the diligentest preacher in all the realme; no lording or loyteriug can hynder him; he is ever applying his busyness; ye shall never f'ynde him idle I warrant you."

From noon until past four, visiters continued to arrive; when the carriages again circ.u.mscribed the Park, each taking up at the gate of Buckingham-house, and thence pa.s.sing home by the Bird-cage Walk, and through the Horse Guards. The arrangements were excellent; no accident occurred. The Life Guards lined the Mall, and a numerous detachment of police-officers were on the alert throughout the day. Their indefatigable exertions however were not entirely available in counteracting the industry of the light-fingered gentry, of whom there were many on the look-out; and doubtless on this, as on every other occasion of public resort in the metropolis, they reaped the fruits of a plentiful harvest.

The party sauntering along the Mall, Sir Felix observed one of the group with whom he was a.s.sociated when viewing the company proceeding to the Palace, and would have entered into familiar chit-chat with him, but for the interposition of Dashall, who taking the Baronet aside, cautioned him against having intercourse with a stranger, of whom he knew nothing, but who had all the appearance of a black-leg.

Dashall was an accurate observer of men and manners; and in the present instance his conjecture was well founded; for, in a few subsequent moments,

~~270~~~ What was the devil's grat.i.tude to Latimer for this eulogy According to his biography, "for his zeal in the Protestant faith, he was, with Ridley, bishop of London, burnt at Oxford in 1554." this a.s.sumed gentleman was met by a reconnoitering party of the police, who claiming the privilege of old acquaintance, took him into custody as a reputed thief, to the manifest surprise and dismay of Miss Judith Macgilligan, who instinctively putting her hand into her pocket, found that her purse had vanished through the medium of some invisible agency.

It contained, fortunately, silver only. She now mentioned her loss, and expressed her suspicion of the gentleman in duresse; he having stood close by her, for a considerable length of time, while she and her friends were stationary in the Mall. The officers accordingly searched him; but the wily adept, antic.i.p.ating consequences, had disenc.u.mbered himself of the purse; part of the silver, however, found in his possession, tallied in description with that which had been lost, although the lady could not identify it as her property. He was conducted from the Park, with the view of being introduced to the recollection of the magistrates of the Public-office in Bow-street.



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