Chapter 74
"No, Rob, I don't mind. It was just a verse from a psalm. She said, _I had fainted unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.... Be of good courage and He shall strengthen thy heart._"
Later, in her room again, she sat by the window through the greater part of the night. The stars were large and soft, the airs faint, the jasmine in the garden below smelled sweet. The hospital day stretched before her; she must sleep so that she could work. She never thought--in that city and time no woman thought--of ceasing from service because of private grief. Moreover, work was her salvation. She would be betimes at the hospital to-morrow, and she would leave it late. She bent once more a long look upon the east, where were the camp-fires of Lee and Stonewall Jackson. In imagination she pa.s.sed the sentries; she moved among the sleeping brigades. She found one tent, or perhaps it would be instead a rude cabin.... She stretched her arms upon the window-sill, and they and her thick fallen hair were wet at last with her tears.
Three days pa.s.sed. On the third afternoon she left the hospital early and went to St. Paul's. She chose again the dusk beneath the gallery, and she prayed dumbly, fiercely, "O G.o.d.... O G.o.d--"
The church was fairly filled. The grey army was now but a little way without the city; it had come back to the seven hills after the seven days. It had come back the hero, the darling. Richmond took the cypress from her doors; put off the purple pall and tragic mask. Last July Richmond was to fall, and this July Richmond was to fall, and lo! she sat secure on her seven hills and her sons did her honour, and for them she would have made herself a waste place. She yet toiled and watched, yet mourned for the dead and hung over the beds of the wounded, and more and more she wondered whence were to appear the next day's yard of cloth and measure of flour. But in these days she overlaid her life with gladness and made her house pleasant for her sons. The service at St.
Paul's this afternoon was one of thankfulness; the hymns rang triumphantly. There were many soldiers. Two officers came in together.
Judith knew General Lee, but the other?... in a moment she saw that it was General Jackson. Her heart beat to suffocation. She sank down in the gold dusk of her corner. "O G.o.d, let him see the truth. O G.o.d, let him see the truth--"
Outside, as she went homeward in the red sunset, she paused for a moment to speak to an old free negro who was begging for alms. She gave him something, and when he had shambled on she stood still a moment here at the corner of the street, with her eyes upon the beautiful rosy west.
There was a garden wall behind her and a tall c.r.a.pe myrtle. As she stood, with the light upon her face, Maury Stafford rode by. He saw her as she saw him. His brooding face flushed; he made as if to check his horse, but did not so. He lifted his hat high and rode on, out of the town, back to the encamped army. Judith had made no answering motion; she stood with lifted face and unchanged look, the rosy light flooding her, the rosy tree behind her. When he was gone she s.h.i.+vered a little.
"It is not Happiness that hates; it is Misery," she thought. "When I was happy I never felt like this. I hate him. He is _glad_ of Richard's peril."
That night she did not sleep at all but sat bowed together in the window, her arms about her knees, her forehead upon them, and her dark hair loose about her. She sat like a sibyl till the dawn, then rose and bathed and dressed, and was at the hospital earliest of all the workers of that day. In the evening again, just at dusk, she reentered the room, and presently again took her seat by the window. The red light of the camp-fires was beginning to show.
There was a knock at the door. Judith rose and opened to a turbaned coloured girl. "Yes, Dilsey?"
"Miss Judith, de gin'ral air downstairs. He say, ax
"Yes, yes, Dilsey! Tell him to come."
When her father came he found her standing against the wall, her hands, outstretched behind her, resting on it. The last soft bloom of day was upon her; indefinably, with her hands so, the wall behind her and her lifted head, she looked a soldier facing a firing party. "Tell me quickly," she said, "the exact truth."
Warwick Gary closed the door behind him and came toward her. "The court found him guilty, Judith."
As she still stood, the light from without upon her face, he took her in his arms, drew her from the wall and made her sit in the chair by the window, then placed himself beside her, and leaning over took her hands in his strong clasp. "Many a court has found many a man guilty, Judith, whom his own soul cleared."
"That is true," she answered. "Your own judgment has not changed?"
"No, Judith, no."
She lifted his hand and kissed it. "Just a moment, and then you'll tell me--"
They sat still in the soft summer air. The stars were coming out. Off to the east showed the long red light where was the army. Judith's eyes rested here. He saw it, and saw, presently, courage lift into her face.
It came steady, with a deathless look. "Now," she said, and loosed her hands.
"It is very bad," he answered slowly. "The evidence was more adverse than I could have dreamed. Only on the last count was there acquittal."
"The last count?--"
"The charge of personal cowardice."
Her eyelids trembled a little. "I am glad," she said, "that they had a gleam of reason."
The other uttered a short laugh, proud and troubled. "Yes. It would not have occurred to me--just that accusation.... Well, he stood cleared of that. But the other charges, Judith, the others--" He rested his hands on his sword hilt and gazed broodingly into the deepening night. "The court could only find as it did. I myself, sitting there, listening to that testimony.... It is inexplicable!"
"Tell me all."
"General Jackson's order was plain. A staff officer carried it to General Winder with perfect correctness. Winder repeated it to the court, and word for word Jackson corroborated it. The same officer, carrying it on from Winder to the 65th came up with a courier belonging to the regiment. To this man, an educated, reliable, trusted soldier, he gave the order."
"He should not have done so?"
"It is easy to say that--to blame because this time there's a snarl to unravel! The thing is done often enough. It should not be done, but it is. Staff service with us is far too irregular. The officer stands to receive a severe reprimand--but there is no reason to believe that he did not give the order to the courier with all the accuracy with which he had already delivered it to Winder. He testified that he did so give it, repeated it word for word to the court. He entrusted it to the courier, taking the precaution to make the latter say it over to him, and then he returned to General Jackson, down the stream, before the bridge they were building. That closed his testimony. He received the censure of the court, but what he did has been done before."
"The courier testified--"
"No. That is the link that drops out. The courier was killed. A Thunder Run man--Steven Dagg--testified that he had been separated from the regiment. Returning to it along the wooded bank of the creek, he arrived just behind the courier. He heard him give the order to the colonel.
'Could he repeat it?' 'Yes.' He did so, and it was, accurately, Jackson's order."
"Richard--what did Richard say?"
"He said the man lied."
"Ah!"
"The courier fell before the first volley from the troops in the woods.
He died almost at once, but two men testified as to the only thing he had said. It was, 'We ought never all of us to have crossed. Tell Old Jack I carried the order straight.'"
He rose and with a restless sigh began to pace the little room. "I see a tangle--something not understood--some stumbling-block laid by laws beyond our vision. We cannot even define it, cannot even find its edges.
We do not know its nature. Things happen so sometimes in this strange world. I do not think that Richard himself understands how the thing chanced. He testified--"
"Yes, oh, yes--"
"He repeated to the court the order he had received. It was not the order that Jackson had given and that Winder had sent on to him, though it differed in only two points. And neither--and there, Judith, there is a trouble!--neither was it with entire explicitness an order to do that which he did do. He acknowledged that, quite simply. He had found at the time an ambiguity--he had thought of sending again for confirmation to Winder. And then--unfortunate man! something happened to strengthen the interpretation which, when all is said, he preferred to receive, and upon which he acted. Time pressed. He took the risk, if there was a risk, and crossed the stream."
"Father, do you blame him?"
"He blames himself, Judith, somewhat cruelly. But I think it is because, just now, of the agony of memory. He loved his regiment.--No. What sense in blaming where, had there followed success, you would have praised?
Then it would have been proper daring; now--I could say that he had been wiser to wait, but I do not know that in his place I should have waited.
He was rash, perhaps, but who is there to tell? Had he chosen another interpretation and delayed, and been mistaken, then, too, commination would have fallen. No. I blame him less than he blames himself, Judith.
But the fact remains. Even by his own showing there was a doubt. Even accepting his statement of the order he received, he took it upon himself to decide."
"They did not accept his statement--"
"No, Judith. They judged that he had received General Jackson's order and had disobeyed it.--I know--I know! To us it is monstrous. But the court must judge by the evidence--and the verdict was to be expected. It was his sole word, and where his own safety was at stake. 'Had not the dead courier a reputation for reliability, for accuracy?' 'He had, and he would not lay the blame there, besmirching a brave man's name.'
'Where then?' 'He did not know. It was so that he had received the order'--Judith, Judith! I have rarely seen truth so helpless as in this case."
She drew a difficult breath. "No help. And they said--"
"He was p.r.o.nounced guilty of the first charge. That carried with it the verdict as to the second--the sacrifice of the regiment. There, too--guilty. Only the third there was no sustaining. The loss was fearful, but there were men enough left to clear him from that charge.
He struggled with desperation to retrieve his error, if error it were; he escaped death himself as by a miracle, and he brought off a remnant of the command which, in weaker hands, might have been utterly swallowed up. On that count he is clear. But on the others--guilty, and without mitigation."
He came back to the woman by the window. "Judith, I would rather put the sword in my own heart than put it thus in yours. War is a key, child, that unlocks to all dreadful things, to all mistakes, to every sorrow!"
"I want every worst drop of it," she said. "Afterward I'll look for comfort. Do not be afraid for me; I feel as strong as the hills, the air, the sea--anything. What is the sentence?"
"Dismissal from the army."