Chapter 44
Tucker nodded. "What say I tag along? I bet I can find a thing or two that needs my attention."
Meredith looked up at her brother with a broad smile. "Oh, Tucker, I think you already have."
Thankfully, Tucker did not respond. In fact, he didn't say a word until they threw open the door of the old miner's shack and stepped inside. "I'm going back to fetch the toolbox. Looks like this place was falling down around his ears."
Truthfully, Fiona only noticed the disarray. She immediately set to work making the tiny makes.h.i.+ft kitchen s.h.i.+ne, while the other two ladies tackled the room where Mr. Abrams had both lived and slept. Tucker returned and began hammering, sawing, and generally making noise in the clearing, which drew Ian's attention.
"Need some help?" Ian called.
Tucker set down his hammer and walked toward Ian, but then Fiona felt another set of eyes on her. Turning, she noticed Meredith studying her intently.
Fiona took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, steadying her hands as well as her nerves. "If you don't need any help, I'm going to gather the was.h.i.+ng and go over to the river."
Meredith gave her a knowing smile. "Of course," she said.
The urge to set Meredith straight bore hard on her as Fiona trudged toward the door. Once outside, she managed to slip past Tucker unnoticed. Ian, however, stopped hammering to watch her disappear around the side of the cabin. By the time she reached the river, her brother's hammer was back in use.
Fiona endured the rest of the afternoon by forcing her thoughts in one direction. As long as she kept her mind focused on where she would someday be rather than where she was, things went well. The distance from the house helped, as did the frigid waters of the river.
At one point, Fiona noticed Ian and Meredith standing a few yards from the house deep in conversation. Perhaps she was mistaken, but it seemed as though the two of them were talking about her. As quickly as she could, Fiona finished her task and slipped past Tucker once again.
She found Meredith cleaning the room's lone window while Violet Abrams bounced a fussy Douglas on her knee. "The was.h.i.+ng's done," she said as she walked over to smile at the baby. "Would you like me to take this little one back home and see if he will sleep better in his own bed?"
Violet gave the baby willingly to Fiona and rose. "Most days I think I want a houseful," she said. "But they are tiring, aren't they?"
Meredith chuckled. "I only wish I'd been prepared for the lack of sleep. Now that he's trying to cut a tooth, it seems as though he never sleeps more than a few hours at a time." She gave Fiona a sheepish look. "Ask Fiona. I'm sure the little prince keeps her awake with his howling."
Fiona giggled. "Only the first night. After that, I learned that a feather pillow and a fur blanket placed over the ears make an effective sound barrier."
As if on cue, Douglas began to cry. "Perhaps you should see if he's hungry, Merry."
A moment later while the baby nursed, Fiona listened to Violet and Meredith chatter on about everything from the unseasonably mild weather to the best way to can vegetables. Outside, she could hear the sound of men working, punctuated occasionally by the call of a bird or the murmur of deep voices.
Not soon enough, the baby had been fed and burped. "He ought to sleep well now," Meredith said as she handed the bundled child over to Fiona. "If he proves to be too much trouble, fetch him back here."
"He'll be fine. If he complains too much, I'll put him to work helping me make supper."
Fiona looked down into the drowsy face of her nephew. She could see the image of his father in the tiny face. A cap of red fuzz completed the picture of a little fellow destined to grow into the substantial shoes of his father. The only signs of his mother on Douglas's face were the perpetual smile-except for during the recent teething episode-and the shape of his chin.
"Let's go for a walk, young Mr. Rafferty, shall we?" She settled the baby into the crook of her arm and tossed his burping cloth over her shoulder. "Tell your mommy good-bye for now."
As Violet waved, Meredith kissed the top of her son's head and then looked up at Fiona. "I'd like to talk to you later, Fiona," she said. "I think it likely you can guess why."
Fiona's heart thumped against her chest, and her gaze fell to the cabin floor. What a can of worms she'd opened by agreeing to Tucker's ludicrous plan. It occurred to her that she didn't even know what that plan was. Further, he'd made no definite promise to help her.
What was I thinking?
"I a.s.sure you there's nothing to talk about, Merry. What you saw..." She looked up and forced herself to stare at her sister-in-law directly. "Rather, what you think you saw, well, it wasn't what it seemed."
"How do you think it seemed?" Her sister-in-law gave no indication of her feelings on the matter.
"Seemed like you found yourself a husband, Miss Rafferty." Violet grinned. "I don't suppose he has a brother?"
The woman's comment broke the tension between Fiona and Meredith. "Believe me," Meredith said, "as wonderful as my brother is, you wouldn't wish for more like him. One Tucker Smith is plenty."
Fiona glanced out the door and spied the subject of their discussion leaning over the water bucket, dipping himself a drink. Ian stood nearby, obviously waiting his turn at the dipper.
"Yes," Fiona said, "I have to agree with Merry. I think one is definitely more than enough of Tucker Smith. Now, shall we take that walk, Douglas?"
The baby greeted her with a yawn as they slipped out the door and past the conversing men. She'd almost escaped the premises when Ian caught up with her. He spoke to Douglas in the silly manner parents address infants and then fell silent.
For a good quarter mile, the pair walked in silence. Fiona refused to be the first to speak; the emotions churning inside her wouldn't allow it. Occasionally, Douglas would snuggle against her, but most of the time he varied between sleeping and watching his father intently.
"You've got a way with Douglas," Ian finally said. "You'll be a wonderful mother someday."
She allowed
They reached the bridge, and Ian sent Fiona ahead of him. The baby stayed still as Fiona balanced his weight while crossing the reused logs. Just before they reached the Rafferty cabin, Ian reached for Fiona's arm.
"Lay the baby down so we can chat, Fiona."
"If it's about Tucker, there's no need." She s.h.i.+fted the sleeping infant to her shoulder and rubbed his back to settle him into sleep again. "What Merry thinks she saw is not what was actually happening."
Ian stood his ground and said not a word as Fiona waited for a response. Finally, he pointed toward the door. "Lay the baby down. There's no need to wake him should the conversation become heated."
Fiona complied, taking her time while she made sure Douglas would not awaken. When she returned, Ian was waiting beside the garden.
"I thought I'd pick peas for dinner. What do you think?"
He looked up, and she realized he must not have noticed her. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"Peas. For dinner." Fiona knelt beside the cabbage plants and began to pluck at the weeds growing between them. "Never mind. Go ahead and speak your piece, big brother. I'll not be able to persuade you of anything until you've said it all."
Ian heaved a long sigh. "Fiona, for the life of me, I'll never understand why you think you've been exiled."
She looked up quickly. "Because I have."
"Perhaps it may seem that way, but did you ever think our father might have had good reason to pack your things and move you here? Maybe reasons you will never know."
Giving up the pretense of weeding, Fiona settled back and faced her brother. "I know this, Ian Rafferty. If you or Braden wished to go to medical college, Da would rush up here and dance an Irish jig all the way back to Oregon with your suitcases on his back. Because I'm a woman, he refuses to consider that I, too, might make a decent doctor."
"Oh, Fiona, don't you see? There's no doubt you'd make much more than a decent doctor. We've all known since you were a wee babe that you had the gift." He paused. "That's not the trouble."
She blinked back the tears that threatened. I will not cry. "Then what, in your estimation, is the trouble?"
"Don't you see, la.s.sie? Da, he wants you to be happy."
"But the only way I'll be happy is if I'm doing the work the Lord has for me. How could I possibly be happy doing anything else?"
Ian took a minute to ponder her question. At least that's what he seemed to be doing. When he dipped his head and pinched the bridge of his nose, Fiona knew for sure.
Finally, he lifted his gaze to meet hers. "Fiona, I don't pretend to know what the Lord's got for you. I do know what our father entrusted me to do, and that was to see to your welfare until such time as a proper husband can be found to take over the job." He paused. "I'm sorry, but that's what Da says, and I have to abide by it."
Fiona's Irish blood began to boil, and she scrambled to her feet. Twice she tried to respond. On the third attempt, she found her voice.
"Ian, who do you listen to, our earthly father or our heavenly Father?"
"That's not fair." Ian rose, fists clenched. "You know the answer to that."
She stomped her foot, not caring that she behaved more like a petulant child than a woman with a legitimate complaint. "Then why aren't you listening to the Lord on this?"
Ian squared his shoulders and peered down at Fiona. His cheeks were as red as his hair, and his eyes blazed with anger. "Because, little sister," he ground out, "it seems as though you're the only one the Lord is telling these things to. He certainly hasn't let me know, and I doubt He's spoken to Da on the matter, either."
With that, Ian turned his back to her and headed toward the river. She had to run to catch him. When she reached his side, she grasped his wrist and held on until he stopped.
"Please hear my side of things, Ian." She didn't care if the tears fell. Her brother could think no less of her for crying. "I never said I didn't want all those things. I would love to have a home and family like you. What I said is that I know this is not what G.o.d wants for me, at least not now."
"All right." Ian pulled his wrist away. "Fair enough. But if you truly mean what you're saying, why were you cavorting around with Merry's brother today?"
"Cavorting around?" Her pulse jumped. "Is that what Merry told you?"
"Never mind what my wife and I discuss." Ian's voice went menacingly low. "Is it true he kissed you?"
"Much as I wish it were, that's not exactly true," came a voice from behind them.
Fiona whirled around. Tucker strode toward them. "Great. Just what I need. Tucker, go home. I can handle my brother."
"Her brother doesn't need to be handled." Ian pointed to Tucker. "What her brother needs is an explanation. Your sister tells me she saw you and Fiona in an intimate embrace earlier."
"Could I speak to you about that alone, Ian? Man to man?"
"No." Fiona said the word just as Ian gave his permission. "I want to be a part of this conversation," she added.
"No," both men said together.
"Go check on Douglas," Ian said. "It's not good to leave him alone when he's been so fussy."
Fiona wanted to argue, but it would do no good. Instead, she gave her brother and Tucker an I-haven't-said-my-last-word-on-this look and headed for the cabin. Once inside, she checked on the sleeping baby and then watched through the window as the men strolled out of sight over the hill.
"Lord," she whispered, "if I'm wrong about this mission You've given me, would You make it clear to me that I got it wrong? You know I'm hardheaded sometimes, but I really thought You wanted me to be a doctor. I have to admit, though, I sure did feel something when Tucker kissed me. And holding Douglas, well, I could have a half dozen just like him and be happy as can be." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I've never asked You before, Lord, but would You give me some sort of sign as to whether or not I should pursue my dream of being a doctor?"
She leaned against the windowsill and rested her chin in her hands. "One more thing, G.o.d. If you want me to stay here, could You perhaps work on Tucker Smith a bit? I can't find too many things wrong with sharing another kiss with him unless You're not agreeable to it."
"I'm going to give you a chance to come clean, Tucker. I've got the highest respect for you, but I want a straight answer about you and my sister."
Tucker swallowed hard. When he had crafted the plan to be left alone by his matchmaking sister, he'd had no idea what sort of trouble he'd be making for both Fiona and himself.
"I have nothing but the most honorable intentions regarding your sister, Ian."
"Then tell me why my wife saw you kissing her. Are you trying to tell me that Merry lied to me?"
"No, never." Tucker held up his hands. "It's just that what she saw wasn't what it looked like."
Ian looked doubtful. "I'm listening."
"When I heard Merry was up to matchmaking, I didn't want any part of it."
"And you figured a woman looking for a man wouldn't be interested in one who was kissing someone else."
"Exactly."
"If I didn't know you better, I'd think you were saying that you took advantage of my sister for your own benefit." He poked Tucker in the chest with his forefinger. "Is that what I'm hearing? Did you take advantage of my sister?"
"No," he said as he stepped back. "I wanted it to look like something was going on so Merry wouldn't force the Abrams woman on me. You see, we recently had a conversation about how I might be feeling a little lonely now that you two are...well...never mind."
Ian's expression softened. "So my wife took it upon herself to fix your problem with the first female who wandered up?" When Tucker nodded, Ian burst into a fit of laughter.
"What's so funny?"
"I was about to punch you for taking advantage of my sister and courting her without my permission, and it turns out to be a game you and Fiona played to throw Merry off the chase."
Tucker joined in the laughter, but a tiny part of his heart refused to go along with the joke. That little sliver of warmth nestled against the cold loneliness he'd felt since his sister married off kept him from declaring victory.
Rather, he had a sinking feeling he hadn't shared his last kiss with Fiona Rafferty. And that feeling scared him more than anything.
Chapter 9.
Ian must have been satisfied with whatever Tucker said, because nothing further was mentioned of the great kiss-by-the-tree debacle. Over the next week, Tucker returned to his pattern of working long hours at the stake and spending what little free time he had at the Rafferty cabin. Eventually, Fiona got used to ignoring the fact that the man sitting on the other side of the table was the same man whose lips had brushed her cheek.
Then she found herself with Tucker after dinner, taking a meal to Mr. Abrams and his niece. By the time they reached the Abramses' cabin, Fiona still hadn't figured out how she had ended up alone on this mission with Tucker. If he had anything to say about it, he kept his peace, speaking only when Violet answered the door.
"We brought supper for the two of you," Tucker said. "It's good to see you back home, Mr. Abrams."
The older man nodded and expressed his thanks while Violet dished the food out and began to feed her uncle. After spending another half hour visiting, Fiona and Tucker made their getaway.
Strolling back under a cloudless sky, Fiona couldn't help but smile. At least she couldn't complain about the Alaskan summer. The long days had been a burden to bear for a while, but now that she'd grown accustomed to sleeping by the clock rather than the light, things went much smoother.
Then there was the friends.h.i.+p that had developed between her and Tucker. It all started when she took to wearing the boots he'd bought her. She found them surprisingly comfortable, and being warm and waterproof made them even better.
The first time Tucker saw her in them, he smiled. He'd been doing so ever since. Oddly, being around Tucker had begun to make her smile, too.