Chapter 93
"No kidding. And the worst part they think I want to become some big shot or something. I tried to explain but none of them would listen, so by now I gave up on trying." Ren sadly noted.
"Are they strange folk?" Kanka asked.
"Definitely" Ren noted, drinking even more from a flask of 'wine'. By now, he was completely wasted.
"Ouch" Kanka cringed at Ren's response.
"But you know what, I came to be rather fond of those weirdoes" Ren smiled.
"They are my family; I wouldn't trade them for the world"
"Can you tell me more about them?" Kanka was getting very curious about the clan Ren hailed from.
"Sure thing. My clan is called the Tengu clan, the two strongest ones there are my grandpa Korgan and Sento Draco; they are both Demon Lords."
"If I had to pick which one is stronger, I would probably say Sento, but grandpa is far more skilled and experienced."
Ren continued.
"Sento is a dragon type demon, he is very rough around the edges and his trainings usually end with bruises and near broken bones."
"That doesn't sound too strange" Kanka was not sure why Ren would Ren find them unusual.
"Yes, and he also the author of the novel t.i.tled 'Journey to the Land of b.o.o.bs'."
Kanka was not sure if he heard Ren right.
"I beg your pardon, what?"
"'Journey to the Land of b.o.o.bs', it's a novel with a protagonist Sento apparently based on himself, whose sole desire in life is to travel to the land of b.o.o.bs, a world where b.r.e.a.s.t.s are growing everywhere, as far as the eye can see."
"While I was cleaning up his room, I stumbled upon something even crazier. I never imagined someone could write such an enormous amount of poetry about female bosoms. Just how frustrated is that guy to write something like that?"
"According to Master Morphus, Dragon type demons are known for having very high libido compared to the other demons…I think."
"Is that so? That would explain why Lotus acted so weird"
Ren chuckled, now seeing a small pattern in Dragon demon behavior.
"As for my grandfather, he wants me to become a worthy leader for the Tengu clan. He ended up teaching me lots of things. But…I can't help but feel like I am just a replacement for my dad, who apparently was the previous leader of my clan."
"I don't wish to make grandpa sad, but the more I hear about my father, the more apparent it is, I am nothing like my dad."
Due to being dead drunk, Ren was far more honest and talkative than usual.
"I heard that Dad was a strong, wise, determined, and brave. I, on the other hand, am a pathetic weakling, a coward who is way in over his head. Everything would have been much better if it was my brother who survived instead of me."
Ren started sulking.
"Don't be too hard on yourself buddy. Your grandfather means well, as far as I can tell. And I am sure he is not thinking of you as a replacement for anyone. If anything, grandparents want their grandkids to be prepared for what life has ahead of them. That's why he takes his time to teach you, so that you have a better life than he did, at least that's what I think."
"I guess you are right…Speaking of which, grandpa apparently has huge collection of weapons in a secret chamber within the mansion. He keeps them hidden from everyone, but he showed me, telling me that one day he hopes I can master them. I am a gardener for crying out loud! Not a warrior!"
Ren continued.
"Then there is Akjan, she is a white fox type demon. I think we get along rather well, out of everyone I have met; she is one of the few who
"Before her brother told me otherwise, I was starting to think that she wanted to a.s.sa.s.sinate me…I know it's silly, but I can never tell what she is thinking, ok?"
"One time I opened a closet, and within it were several giant stuffed bears that came to life and started chasing me. Apparently, Akjan likes knitting, so she made those stuffed bears, enchanted them with animation spell, and hid them in the closet. Being chased by those things is far scarier than it sounds. Stabbing had no effect and even burning them did nothing to stop them from coming after me"
Kanka found himself covering his mouth, resisting his urge to laugh the more Ren told him about his misadventures.
"My mentor's name is Aijasyl; she is a half demon, apparently a green salamander type demon. For some weird reason she wants me to learn how to dance, she said something about magic synchronization and combining magic of two casters into a single spell or something…I am not completely certain."
"One night, when I ended up falling asleep behind the curtains, I woke up to find her practicing dancing in the ball room."
"That does not sound too weird"
"Oh yes, she was dancing rather gracefully, with a real life size dummy she made herself. The dummy even wore a suit and a bow tie."
"After the dancing practice was done, she gave the dummy a rather long and pa.s.sionate kiss. It was a little disturbing to watch her making out with a dummy. It was even harder to keep myself hidden before she left the room."
Kanka thought that if he had lungs, he would have lost all the air in them from laughing too hard.
"Among the male members of my clan, there is Orin; he is a beetle type demon."
"For a four armed demon, you would expect him to excel in close ranged combat, but no. He is specialist in long ranged attacks, and when it comes to close combat, he is just terrible at it. It's not that he is weak; he definitely is far stronger than me, but he is really clumsy. But he is an excellent cook, I have to give him that much."
"One day, I thought I heard the sound of a dying animal, so I rushed in to put it out of its misery. But it turns it was Orin singing. He did not realize I was watching him perform. Then, he proceeded to take out a large bra.s.s instrument and started to play on it. I never heard a more disturbing melody. I remember thinking 'Is this what death sounds like?' before pa.s.sing out."
"Then, there is Korkau. He is a frost wolf type demon, so pretty much a walking freezing zone. From what the lizard demons tell me, Korkau has a strange hobby of collecting shed skins of animals and demons. So far, he has collected shed scales of lizard and dragon demons, but apparently he wants to collect snake demon scales as well. What's up with that?"
"Everyone has their own hobbies, Ren. Some collect coins and some collect shed scales. I once met a guy who collected dried human organs. Everyone has their own thing"
"I guess. But one day, Korkau dropped a journal. I took a peak before returning it; the content is plain scary. He wrote down names of every demon he wanted to kill. And guess what? My name appears in his journal at least twenty times and each time, he crossed it off his list. Yikes! What did I do to make him hate me that much?"
"Trying to make everyone like you is a waste of time; I suggest you stop worrying about it."
"I guess you are right about that too. Huuhh…. Then, there is Karli, Korkau's sister. For some weird reason, she keeps sneaking into my bedroom at night. So I have been thinking of putting a door lock on the door. She has many flowers and decorations in her room which she has preserved with her near-permanent freezing spells."
"But then, I found some 'statues' in her room, which actually were frozen animals. Every time she thinks something is 'cute', she freezes it and takes it home with her. I once even found her cutting up small animal corpses into pieces, just to put them back together to make a unique statue"
Ren looked a little mortified from remembering that.
"And recently, I met a demon named Lotus Draco, who apparently is my fiancée. My grandpa and Sento organized this while I was away, and by the time I came back, it was too late. She is just as bad as Karli, if not worse. I have known her for less than a month, and she already is suggesting having kids. I know I am the leader of Tengu clan, but wow, just wow. What the h.e.l.l do they think I am? A harem seeker or something?"
"While Lotus appears prim and proper, she apparently likes weapons. I found several swords, spears, and daggers underneath her bed when I was cleaning up the rooms. And one time, I caught a glimpse of her wearing a dress, and making strange poses in front of a mirror, while shouting cool catch phrases. I think she is a little weird."
"Everyone goes through that phase at one point in life, but some don't grow out of it" Kanka remarked.
"I guess that's true. Oh, right! There is Sirinke! That lizard demon eats anything, literally anything he comes across! Tree bark, metal, rocks…doesn't matter."
"He is like a walking stomach. He told me he is preparing for a food eating compet.i.tion which I am hosting sometime in the next couple of months, but that's some devotion all right. But I hope he can restrain himself, because the last time I saw him, he was eating a pair of old boots. I could only offer him some salt and pepper in response."
"Do you guys have a food shortage or something?"
"That's the point, we don't! Sirinke just eats everything! All of my clan members are strange, in one way or another!"
Due to his small presence, Ren could watch his clan members undetected.
His mana signature was as small as that of a plant, making him nearly undetectable.
Because of this, Ren ended up witnessing many cringe worthy moments of his clan members.