Chapter 11
"But if there is no will, Miss Honey, then surely the house goes automatically to you. You are the next of kin."
"I know I am," Miss Honey said. "But my aunt produced a piece of paper supposedly written by my father saying that he leaves the house to his sister-in-law in return for her kindness in looking after me. I am certain it's a forgery. But no one can prove it."
"Couldn't you try?" Matilda said. "Couldn't you hire a good lawyer and make a fight of it."
"I don't have the money to do that," Miss Honey said. "And you must remember that this aunt of mine is a much respected figure in the community. She has a lot of influence."
"Who is she?" Matilda asked.
Miss Honey hesitated a moment. Then she said softly, "Miss Trunchbull."
The Names
"Miss Trunchbull!" Matilda cried, jumping about a foot in the air. "You mean she she is your aunt? is your aunt? She She brought you up?" brought you up?"
"Yes," Miss Honey said.
"No wonder wonder you were terrified!" Matilda cried. "The other day we saw her grab a girl by the pigtails and throw her over the playground fence!" you were terrified!" Matilda cried. "The other day we saw her grab a girl by the pigtails and throw her over the playground fence!"
"You haven't seen anything," Miss Honey said. "After my father died, when I was five and a half, she used to make me bath myself all alone. And if she came up and thought I hadn't washed properly she would push my head under the water and hold it there. But don't get me started on what she used to do. That won't help us at all."
"No," Matilda said, "it won't."
"We came here", Miss Honey said," to talk about you you and I've been talking about nothing but myself the whole time. I feel like a fool. I am much more interested in just how much you can do with those amazing eyes of yours." and I've been talking about nothing but myself the whole time. I feel like a fool. I am much more interested in just how much you can do with those amazing eyes of yours."
"I can move things," Matilda said. "I know I can. I can push things over."
"How would you like it", Miss Honey said, "if we made some very cautious experiments to see just how much you can move and push?"
Quite surprisingly, Matilda said, "If you don't mind, Miss Honey, I think I would rather not. I want to go home now and think and think about all the things I've heard this afternoon."
Miss Honey stood up at once. "Of course," she said. "I have kept you here far too long. Your mother will be starting to worry."
"She never does that," Matilda said, smiling. "But I would like to go home now please, if you don't mind."
"Come along then," Miss Honey said. "I'm sorry I gave you such a rotten tea."
"You didn't at all," Matilda said. "I loved it."
The two of them walked all the way to Matilda's house in complete silence. Miss Honey sensed that Matilda wanted it that way. The child seemed so lost in thought she hardly looked where she was walking, and when they reached the gate of Matilda's home, Miss Honey said, "You had better forget everything I told you this afternoon."
"I won't promise to do that," Matilda said, "but I will promise not to talk about it to anyone any more, not even to you."
"I think that would be wise," Miss Honey said.
"I won't promise to stop thinking about it, though, Miss Honey," Matilda said. "I've been thinking about it all the way back from your cottage and I believe I've got just a tiny little bit of an idea."
"You mustn't," Miss Honey said. "Please forget it."
"I would like to ask you three last things before I stop talking about it," Matilda said. "Please will you answer them, Miss Honey?"
Miss Honey smiled. It was extraordinary, she told herself, how this little snippet of a girl seemed suddenly to be taking charge of her problems, and with such authority, too. "Well," she said, "that depends on what the questions are."
"The first thing is this," Matilda said. "What did Miss Trunchbull call your father your father when they were around the house at home?" when they were around the house at home?"
"I'm sure she called him Magnus," Miss Honey said. "That was his first name."
"And what did your father call Miss Trunchbull?"
"Her name is Agatha," Miss Honey said. "That's what he would have called her."
"And lastly," Matilda said, "what did your father and Miss Trunchbull call you you around the house?" around the house?"
"They called me Jenny," Miss Honey said.
Matilda pondered these answers very carefully. "Let me make sure I've got them right," she said. "In the house at home, your father was Magnus, Miss Trunchbull was Agatha and you were Jenny. Am I right?"
"That is correct," Miss Honey said.
"Thank you," Matilda said. "And now I won't mention the subject any more."
Miss Honey wondered what on earth was going on in the mind of this child. "Don't do anything silly," she said.
Matilda laughed and turned away and ran up the path to her front-door, calling out as she went, "Good-bye, Miss Honey! Thank you so much for the tea."
The Practice
Matilda found the house empty as usual. Her father was not yet back from work, her mother was not yet back from bingo and her brother might be anywhere. She went straight into the living-room and opened the drawer of the sideboard where she knew her father kept a box of cigars. She took one out and carried it up to her bedroom and shut herself in.
Now for the practice, she told herself. It's going to be tough but I'm determined to do it.
Her plan for helping Miss Honey was beginning to form beautifully in her mind. She had it now in almost every detail, but in the end it all depended upon her being able to do one very special thing with her eye-power. She knew she wouldn't manage it right away, but she felt fairly confident that
There was a small dressing-table in Matilda's bedroom with her hairbrush and comb on it and two library books. She cleared these things to one side and laid the cigar down in the middle of the dressing-table. Then she walked away and sat on the end of her bed. She was now about ten feet from the cigar.
She settled herself and began to concentrate, and very quickly this time she felt the electricity beginning to flow inside her head, gathering itself behind the eyes, and the eyes became hot and millions of tiny invisible hands began pus.h.i.+ng out like sparks towards the cigar. "Move!" she whispered, and to her intense surprise, almost at once, the cigar with its little red and gold paper band around its middle rolled away across the top of the dressing-table and fell on to the carpet.
Matilda had enjoyed that. It was lovely doing it. It had felt as though sparks were going round and round inside her head and flas.h.i.+ng out of her eyes. It had given her a sense of power that was almost ethereal. And how quick it had been this time! How simple!
She crossed the bedroom and picked up the cigar and put it back on the table.
Now for the difficult one, she thought. But if I have the power to push, push, then surely I also have the power to then surely I also have the power to lift lift? It is vital vital I learn how to lift it. I I learn how to lift it. I must must learn how to lift it right up into the air and keep it there. It is not a very heavy thing, a cigar. learn how to lift it right up into the air and keep it there. It is not a very heavy thing, a cigar.
She sat on the end of the bed and started again. It was easy now to summon up the power behind her eyes. It was like pus.h.i.+ng a trigger in the brain. "Lift!" "Lift!" she whispered. she whispered. "Lift! Lift!" "Lift! Lift!"
At first the cigar started to roll away. But then, with Matilda concentrating fiercely, one end of it slowly lifted up about an inch off the table-top.
With a colossal effort, she managed to hold it there for about ten seconds. Then it fell back again.
"Phew!" she gasped. "I'm getting it! I'm starting to do it!"
For the next hour, Matilda kept practising, and in the end she had managed, by the sheer power of her eyes, to lift the whole cigar clear off the table about six inches into the air and hold it there for about a minute. Then suddenly she was so exhausted she fell back on the bed and went to sleep.
That was how her mother found her later in the evening.
"What's the matter with you?" the mother said, waking her up. "Are you ill?"
"Oh gosh," Matilda said, sitting up and looking around. "No. I'm all right. I was a bit tired, that's all."
From then on, every day after school, Matilda shut herself in her room and practised with the cigar. And soon it all began to come together in the most wonderful way. Six days later, by the following Wednesday evening, she was able not only to lift the cigar up into the air but also to move it around exactly as she wished. It was beautiful. "I can do it!" she cried. "I can really do it! I can pick the cigar up just with my eye-power and push it and pull it in the air any way I want!"
All she had to do now was to put her great plan into action.
The Third Miracle
The next day was Thursday, and that, as the whole of Miss Honey's cla.s.s knew, was the day on which the Headmistress would take charge of the first lesson after lunch.
In the morning Miss Honey said to them, "One or two of you did not particularly enjoy the last occasion when the Headmistress took the cla.s.s, so let us all try to be especially careful and clever today. How are your ears, Eric, after your last encounter with Miss Trunchbull?"
"She stretched them," Eric said. "My mother said she's positive they are bigger than they were."
"And Rupert," Miss Honey said, "I am glad to see you didn't lose any of your hair after last Thursday."
"My head was jolly sore afterwards," Rupert said.
"And you, Nigel," Miss Honey said, "do please try not to be smart-aleck with the Headmistress today. You were really quite cheeky to her last week."
"I hate her," Nigel said.
"Try not to make it so obvious," Miss Honey said. "It doesn't pay. She's a very strong woman. She has muscles like steel ropes."
"I wish I was grown up," Nigel said. "I'd knock her flat."
"I doubt you would," Miss Honey said. ''No one has ever got the better of her yet."
"What will she be testing us on this afternoon?" a small girl asked.
"Almost certainly the three-times table," Miss Honey said. "That's what you are all meant to have learnt this past week. Make sure you know it."
Lunch came and went.
After lunch, the cla.s.s rea.s.sembled. Miss Honey stood at one side of the room. They all sat silent, apprehensive, waiting. And then, like some giant of doom, the enormous Trunchbull strode into the room in her green breeches and cotton smock. She went straight to her jug of water and lifted it up by the handle and peered inside.
"I am glad to see", she said, "that there are no slimy creatures in my drinking-water this time. If there had been, then something exceptionally unpleasant would have happened to every single member of this cla.s.s. And that includes you, Miss Honey."
The cla.s.s remained silent and very tense. They had learnt a bit about this tigress by now and n.o.body was about to take any chances.
"Very well," boomed the Trunchbull. "Let us see how well you know your three-times table. Or to put it another way, let us see how badly Miss Honey has taught you the three-times table." The Trunchbull was standing in front of the cla.s.s, legs apart, hands on hips, scowling at Miss Honey who stood silent to one side.
Matilda, sitting motionless at her desk in the second row, was watching things very closely.
"You!" the Trunchbull shouted, pointing a finger the size of a rolling-pin at a boy called Wilfred. Wilfred was on the extreme right of the front row. "Stand up, you!" she shouted at him.
Wilfred stood up.
"Recite the three-times table backwards!" the Trunchbull barked.
"Backwards?" stammered Wilfred. "But I haven't learnt it backwards."
"There you are!" cried the Trunchbull, triumphant. "She's taught you nothing! Miss Honey, why have you taught them absolutely nothing at all in the last week?"
"That is not true, Headmistress," Miss Honey said. "They have all learnt their three-times table. But I see no point in teaching it to them backwards. There is little point in teaching anything backwards. The whole object of life, Headmistress, is to go forwards. I venture to ask whether even you, for example, can spell a simple word like wrong wrong backwards straight away. I very much doubt it." backwards straight away. I very much doubt it."
"Don't you get impertinent with me, Miss Honey!" the Trunchbull snapped, then she turned back to the unfortunate Wilfred. "Very well, boy," she said. "Answer me this. I have seven apples, seven oranges and seven bananas. How many pieces of fruit do I have altogether? Hurry up! Get on with it! Give me the answer!"
"That's adding up adding up!" Wilfred cried. "That isn't the three-times table!"
"You blithering idiot!" shouted the Trunchbull. You festering gumboil! You fleabitten fungus! That is is the three-times table! You have three separate lots of fruit and each lot has seven pieces. Three sevens are twenty-one. Can't you see that, you stagnant cesspool! I'll give you one more chance. I have eight coconuts, eight monkey-nuts and eight nutty little idiots like you. How many nuts do I have altogether? Answer me quickly." the three-times table! You have three separate lots of fruit and each lot has seven pieces. Three sevens are twenty-one. Can't you see that, you stagnant cesspool! I'll give you one more chance. I have eight coconuts, eight monkey-nuts and eight nutty little idiots like you. How many nuts do I have altogether? Answer me quickly."
Poor Wilfred was properly fl.u.s.tered. "Wait!" he cried. "Please wait! I've got to add up eight coconuts and eight monkey-nuts..." He started counting on his fingers.
"You bursting blister!" yelled the Trunchbull. "You moth-eaten maggot! This is not not adding up! This is multiplication! The answer is three eights! Or is it eight threes? What is the difference between three eights and eight threes? Tell me that, you mangled little wurzel and look sharp about it!" adding up! This is multiplication! The answer is three eights! Or is it eight threes? What is the difference between three eights and eight threes? Tell me that, you mangled little wurzel and look sharp about it!"
By now Wilfred was far too frightened and bewildered even to speak.
In two strides the Trunchbull was beside him, and by some amazing gymnastic trick, it may have been judo or karate, she flipped the back of Wilfred's legs with one of her feet so that the boy shot up off the ground and turned a somersault in the air. But halfway through the somersault she caught him by an ankle and held him dangling upside-down like a plucked chicken in a shop-window.
"Eight threes," the Trunchbull shouted, swinging Wilfred from side to side by his ankle, "eight threes is the same as three eights and three eights are twenty-four! Repeat that!"
At exactly that moment Nigel, at the other end of the room, jumped to his feet and started pointing excitedly at the blackboard and screaming, "The chalk! The chalk! Look at the chalk! It's moving all on its own!"
So hysterical and shrill was Nigel's scream that everyone in the place, including the Trunchbull, looked up at the blackboard. And there, sure enough, a brand-new piece of chalk was hovering near the grey-black writing surface of the blackboard.
"It's writing something!" screamed Nigel. screamed Nigel. "The chalk is writing something!" "The chalk is writing something!"
And indeed it was.