Chapter 25
Si Weimin was staring at the paintings on the wall – each one spoke of different emotions. With a bitter chuckle, he put his hand on his nape as he started ma.s.saging it – trying to ease the stiffness he felt.
He was in his art room – filled with paintings which were all painted by Xu Jia Li wherein he had collected over the past years. The numbing sensation brought about by her sudden retreat broke his heart.
Feeling exhausted, he sat at the edge of his table and grabbed his phone. His heart and mind was in chaos as he tried his best not to call her.
He had been thinking of calling her but his mind told him not to. He was worried, d.a.m.n worried that he scared the h.e.l.l out of her with his impulsive behaviour. For the first time in his life, he didn't know what to do. He was at lost.
He'd been trying hard to keep his distance, satisfying himself of loving him from afar. Yet, the moment he saw her, he lost all sense of control and rationality. He was no longer the same every time he's near her. It was like he was being brought back to the time when they met, when all sense of responsibility and rationality ceased to exist.
He was like a kid who was craving for a candy – no matter how hard he tried to control the urging temptation, at the end, he was weak. One taste and he couldn't get enough of her.
He basically didn't know what came up to him. He cursed himself as he stood and kick the table on his side. He kicked it several times – blaming himself for his actions.
"d.a.m.n! d.a.m.n! I scared the h.e.l.l out of her!"
He slammed his fist on the table, with his chest rising up and down, he was panting really hard as he looked at Xu Jia Li's picture on the table. It was her picture when she won her first medal for singing. Her eyes were s.h.i.+ning bright, with medals on her neck and trophy on her hand; she smiled that captivating smile of hers in front of the camera.
She was really a sight to behold; the only scene he was willing to capture; and the only sight he would never ever be tired of.
He was a fool; his heart had always been crazy about her. This side of him he never wanted to her to see, however, it was too late now. He succ.u.mbed to his longing for her.
He had been waiting for the right time. The time where he could finally tell her his feeling; where he could confess to her; where he could finally be honest about what he feels; and where he could finally be there for her, not acting on the background but be there, physically and emotionally for her – beside her.
When she gave him that look, he knew he couldn't keep himself from taking the opportunity to kiss her. And when he kissed her, everything seemed to stop existing. Those soft lips made him lost control. Her small waist and slender
However, he was also thankful that she pushed him hard and ran away from him. He was no saint; he didn't know what he could have done if the kiss continued even a bit.
He wanted to make her love him, the way he loved her but it wouldn't be fair for her. So, when she ran away, no matter how hard he wanted to follow her, he stopped himself and stayed back.
He didn't even mind the questioning gaze of w.a.n.g Guo upon seeing him slumping on the floor. He ignored him, stood and strode fast leaving him behind.
Last night had given him head ache when he woke up. He called w.a.n.g Guo and told him that he wouldn't be going to work. The dizzying feeling he had when he woke up linger.
He held Xu Jia Li's picture and sighed, "How could I ever be there for you when I couldn't even control myself when I'm near you?"
He put her picture down and called w.a.n.g Guo, "I've sent you the photo of the teddy bear and roses; make sure to buy the exact items and send them to Xu Jia Li."
"Yes, CEO Si. How about the letters, CEO?"
"Hmm. Ask the delivery guy to come here before delivering the items."
"I'll do just that, CEO."
When the call ended, Si Weimin sat on the wooden chair and opened the drawer of the table. He got a small red envelope and took out the paper inside.
He started scribbling his message for her. He wanted to let her know that although what happened shouldn't have happened, he had no regret about it.
After writing his message, he put the paper back inside the red envelope and stood.
"I hope you're not that mad at me."
________________________________________________________________
Harvest Condominium
Xu Jia Li was torn between opening her heart and shutting it tight. Upon reading Si Weimin's letter, she hugged the huge teddy bear and cried. She was in the state of shock as his words played in her mind, 'Eighteen years? He loved me for 18 years?'
"How could someone love you for 18 long years?"
She wiped her tears and stared at the fluffy teddy bear on her hand. It was even bigger than her. The colour blue was even her favourite, she suddenly questioned if he really did know her favourite colour or it was just a coincidence.
He caressed the teddy bear's face and spoke as if she was talking to Si Weimin,
"I'm so sorry but I couldn't accept your feelings."
She hugged it tightly and buried her face on its soft body. She knew inside that Si Weimin had already captured her heart. But her mind was telling her that loving him would be her biggest hindrance in achieving her goal.
She had been waiting for a long time to fulfil her promised to her mother. She couldn't let her emotion to dwindle, not when her goal was almost a grasp away. She knew that she had to stop – loving him would only result to more heart aches in the future.
A handsome and rich CEO like him had a lot of beautiful women he could easily choose from. She was nothing compared to them.
"I may just be your flavour of the month."
She sniffed as he punched the poor teddy bear and threw it on the floor.
"Why would I cry, huh? You could just be playing with me!"
She grabbed the teddy bear again and continuously punched its soft and fury body.
"Huh! Si Weimin! 18 years? Who are you fooling?! No one could love for such a long time! Humph! Stop messing with me!"
As she was releasing her frustrations on the poor thing, her doorbell rang, *ding dong*
Still holding the teddy bear on her embrace, she walked towards the door; she peeked through the peephole and saw a man standing outside. He looked like a courier so she immediately opened it,
"Yes?"
"Good morning. Are you Miss Xu Jia Li?"
She nodded and the man handed her a parcel. With her brows furrowed, she asked the man who sent it but instead of answering, the man only nodded and left.
She was somehow baffled on this another parcel because no one knew where she lived, she had another house on Beijing that most of the press knew. However, her apartment was only her escape to the industry, not many people knew about it.
Si Weimin knew, however she knew that it would be easy for him to know about her address but for other people, she suddenly felt her face stiffened with alarm.
She dropped the teddy bear on the floor and locked the door. Before she opened the parcel, she dialled Lan Meixu's number and asked, "Meixu-jie, did someone ask for my address?"
"Oh! I'm guilty. a.s.sistant w.a.n.g Guo asked. But anyway, he already knew. He just somehow confirmed."
"Yea, I know. Any other?"
"Well, nothing that I know of. Why are you even asking?"
"Someone just sent a parcel. I'm checking it out. I'll call Linqin later."
After ending the call, Xu Jia Li sat on the sofa and started to open the parcel. Her heart was beating fast as she tore it.
With one full swift, she saw a letter inside. With shaking hands, she grabbed and opened it.
Xu Jia Li,
Don't always believe everything that you hear. What you see isn't always what it is.
What you know isn't always what they should. There are things that aren't what they seem.
You have to dig deeper. Find out. And in doing so, I hope you'll finally free your heart.
The hair on her neck stood high as she felt a chilling sensation brought by the letter to her body. There was no sender. She was even more frightened and baffled as she read the last line.
Be careful.