Mouth Little Goddess
Chapter 531 - The Foul-Mouth Little Goddess
A day later after the battle against Gan Ji, Xu Huang reclaimed the Xu Province from the Sima Clan. All 150,000 soldiers surrendered and joined the Silver Legion, increasing its size from 70,000 men to 220,000 men.
Xu Huang immediately relayed his order to his troops.
"We'll deploy right away and march south! Our next goal is Lujiang, but be ready to fight a large horde of monsters if we run into them!"
The Silver Axe Legion didn't understand what a fiend army or a horde of monsters was. However, judging from their general's tone, they speculated that it might be a tough fight.
Cannons, modern guns, muskets, spears, swords, warhorses, hwachas, repeating crossbows, mini-crossbows, gunpowder bombs, everything that Tong's armies had was brought along with the Silver Axe Legion.
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Sun Quan and Huang Gai's units of 140,000 men departed from Shouchun and headed east, moving toward Guangling, where Gan Ji's undead army located.
Along the way, they didn't forget to conscript local men as their reserve soldiers and perform a public duty.
"This decrease is caused by mosquitoes. All infected malaria patients have common symptoms, like headache, vomiting, and high fever. But don't worry. It can be prevented by using mosquito nets to cover your beds. For those that are already infected, I've already taught the local priests and physicians about the treatment and gave them the necessary medicines. You can ask them to if you…"
Sun Shangxiang, aka Hua Shi, was teaching the local civilians about malaria disease, which was a common sickness in this area of the country and killed thousands of people each year. She also distributed medicines, which were created by her system skill, Medical Gift.
All pills, medicinal liquid, herbs, and everything that Sun Shangxiang created were also enhanced by her blessing. Therefore, the effect was a hundred times better than modern medicine.
A simple Aspirin or Ibuprofen tablet could cure inflammation and relieve pain instantly without causing a side effect like ordinary medicine.
Other types of drugs for treating deadly diseases, such as cholera, pneumonia, influenza, malaria, and others could also cure patients within a few seconds after consumption.
The miracle medicines impressed the townspeople. Many of them wanted to repay Sun Shangxiang's kindness.
Able men offered themselves to join the military. Elders, women, and children volunteered to assist Sun Quan's troops. Some of them donated food and money to contribute, hoping to help Sun Shangxiang and her family.
Everyone loved her and wanted to protect her. Even dogs, cows, and chickens flocked around her as if she were Doctor Dolittle.
Still, Sun Shangxiang declined them all. Instead, she gave them suggestions.
"If you wish to help us, I hope that all of you to stay healthy and develop your farmlands and your businesses. Don't take advantage of others and help your neighbors when they need it. If you lack money, visit the authority and ask them for a job. If you lack money and food, visit the authority again and tell them your situation. Our government takes taxes from the rich people to help the poor, so don't be afraid to ask for help if you really need it. Don't slack off and become a beggar, though. We don't help thugs and beggars."
Hua Shi was aware of the karma law, reincarnation, and life after death. She didn't forget to sow good karma whenever she had a chance.
Moreover, after Medusa taught her about karma laws and the late-stage cultivation without the help of Lilim's dimension system, Hua Shi avoided committing serious crimes. She made a vow to herself that she would never leave bad karma that might come back to haunt her again.
As a result of various good deeds and her image, Sun Shangxiang, who was only 8-year-old this year, made a name of herself. Combining with her 7 feather wings and the medicine's miracle, the local people gave her a nickname once again.
The Little Goddess
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= Sun Shangxiang Resting Quarter =
The little girl with 7 silver feather wings laid down on her cotton bed, exhausted from the public services.
She buried her face in her pillow before she yelled.
"FUUUUUUUUUUCCCKKKK!!! ANNOYINGGGGG!!! I DON'T WANT TO WORK!!!! I'M TIRED OF BEING A KID!!!! I WANT TO BE AN ADULT!!! I WANT TO SEE TONG!!! I'M HORNY!!! I WANT TO FUCKKKKK!!!"
Four
This was a common occurrence for those who served Sun Shangxiang. They knew the true face of this "Little Goddess" that she didn't have the halo like how the others believed.
Instead, she was the "Little Devil Princess" that had deceived everybody. Not one day that profanity and vulgar words stopped coming out of her mouth.
No one could reprimand her or report her action to Wu Guotai either. Although Sun Shangxiang never threatened her servants, her malicious killing intent hinted everybody that they had to keep their mouth shut. Violation might result in their heads separating from their necks.
However, one man knew about Sun Shangxiang's true face.
Sun Quan heard the yell while he was walking nearby his sister's quarter. He came here to invite her to join their war meeting at the main commander tent.
'I'm glad she's a reincarnator. If she were the other Sun Shangxiang, mother would have cried for days.'
Sun Quan's paled face sweated as he knocked on the door.
"Shangxiang, we're having a meeting in an hour. I need you at the central tent."
A loud voice from the room penetrated Sun Quan's eardrums.
"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK!!!"
All servants and bodyguards' mouth foamed and passed out as they couldn't handle the noise anymore. Sun Shangxiang's voice was too powerful for ordinary cultivators to withstand for a long time.
As for Sun Quan, he got dizzied and staggered backward.
Frustrated by Hua Shi, Sun Quan kicked the doors open, "SHAADDDDUUUUUPPP!!"
As soon as Sun Quan got inside, he was greeted by a foot on his face.
*BOOM*
Sun Quan's body got sent flying 10 meters.
"DON'T BARGE IN A LADY'S ROOM WITHOUT HER PERMISSION, YOU IMBECILE FUCK!!"
Sun Quan stood up and yelled back, "A BITCH IN HEAT DOESN'T DESERVE A GENTLEMAN'S COURTESY!!"
"YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME, MAMA TIT SUCKER!!??"
"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT FROM A CHILD SLUT!!"
The two siblings got into a fistfight.
…
Half an hour later, Sun Quan and Sun Shangxiang arrived at the meeting tent.
Bruises and scratches were visible on their faces, and their hair became messy.
Huang Gai, Han Dang, Cheng Pu, Zhang Zhao, Zhang Hong, Lu Xun, and Lu Meng were already there, waiting for their young lord. All of them maintained their pokerface in front of their scrubby siblings.
"Ahem," Lu Xun began the briefing, "Now that we're all here, I would like to review the current placement of our enemies and their locations…"
Gan Ji's undead army moved surprisingly slower than their average marching speed. The scouts, who detached their souls to check the army's location, found out that they only traveled 5 kilometers a day.
From the direction they were heading, the undead seemed to target Shouchun, which was their supply center headquarters for the southern campaign.
The distance between Guangling and Shouchun was about 250 kilometers. With a rough calculation, they would take 50 days in total to reach there.
As for Sun Quan's troops, they were resting 50km east of Shouchun, and their military camp was 200km away from the undead army. If they were serious, they could intercept Gan Ji's army within 10 days.
They had rooms to act, but Lu Xun wasn't happy with their current speed advantage.
"I've also scouted their soldiers with my detached soul. Those monsters don't need provision, and they don't need rest. Their primary weapons are clubs, rusty pikes, and farmer forks. They don't have cultivation power. However, some local policemen who fought against these soldiers reported that they couldn't kill a single of them with arrows."
Lu Xun bit his lower lip and gazed at Sun Quan and Sun Shangxiang.
"To be honest, we lack intel about these monsters. We don't know how to kill them."
Sun Quan raised his eyebrows in doubt, "Are they that invincible?"
"Arrows couldn't harm them. We clearly shot them, but they could continue fighting."
"How about swords and spears?"
"No local militias had tried that yet since they were scared of those monsters."
"…"
While everybody's mood was serious, Sun Shangxiang's face was distorted as she was picking her nose.
She flickered a half-finger-size booger, which hit Sun Quan's forehead.
"Oi!" Sun Quan got angry, "Stop messing around! Everyone is working here!"
"Then, work smarter! Why the hell are you dumb motherfuckers afraid of zombies anyway? If it were my old world, all children and their grandmothers would have celebrated and finished gearing up to fight before the military!"
Everybody in the tent got offended that the little girl belittled their intelligence and courage. Lu Meng stood up and cupped his fist at Sun Shangxiang, asking his young lady about her opinion.
"Do you know a way to defeat these monsters?"
Sun Shangxiang snorted. She ignored Lu Meng and turned toward Lu Xun, "You said that those soldiers couldn't be killed by arrows. Can you confirm something for me?"
"Uh, yes?"
"Where do the soldiers usually aim?"
"… Pardon?"
Sun Shangxiang got annoyed, "Which part of enemies did our soldiers usually aim!? Head? Body? Penis? Or your limb dick!?"
Lu Xun sweated, "T-The heart. We always aim for the chest and body since it's easier to aim."
"THAT'S WHY THOSE MEN COULDN'T KILL THEM, YOU DUMB SISSY!! WHEN YOU FIGHT ZOMBIES, SHOOT THEIR FUCKING HEAD!! USE A BIT OF LOGIC, DAMN TIT SUCKING CUNT!!"
"Ugh, what're zombies again?"
"DID YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND HUMAN LANGUAGE!? LET ME ASK YOU THIS. WHAT ARE THE DESCRIPTION OF THOSE SO-CALLED MONSTERS!?"
"T-They are living corpses-"
"THAT IS THE DEFINITION OF ZOMBIES, YOU DUMB BUTT-CRACKING FUCKER!!
"…"
All the profanity and vulgar swearing came out of Hua Shi's mouth for another 30 minutes.
…
Sun Shangxiang got tired after she screamed at everyone non-stop. She picked up a 2-liter bowl of grape wine and poured them all in her little mouth to quench her thirst.
Then, she turned toward Lu Meng and continued yelling.
"YOU WANT MY OPINION? HERE IS MY ADVICE, PRE-EJECULATING GREENHORNS. GATHER THOSE GUNS AND BULLETS AND GIVE THEM TO SHARPSHOOTERS. TELL THEM TO FUCKING SHOOT THEM IN THE HEAD. TREAT THE BULLET AS IF THEY WERE PENISES SEEKING TO ENTER A BUNCH OF VIRGINAS ON THOSE ZOMBIES BRAINS!! NOW, I WANT YOU TO SELECT ALL PEACOCK-BUTT-HUMPING MINIONS WITH 2 ERECTING PENIS WINGS OR HIGHER AND ARM THEM WITH DIAOCHAN'S GUNS. ASSIGN THOSE ANIMAL RAPERS TO ME, AND I'LL SHOW THEM HOW TO RESIDENT-EVIL LIKE A BOSS!!"
Everyone: "…"
The scene looked comical to outsiders as a little girl was scolding all grown-up men as if she were a drill sergeant. However, all officers in the tent didn't dare to voice their objection or refute against Sun Shangxiang's rude behavior.
Everybody here had learned that this girl was the reincarnation of Hua Shi, the former Goddess of Death. As Tong's first wife, her words were the same as Tong's mandate even though Dong Bai held the title as empress and Diaochan was the mastermind.
Sun Quan understood only 30% of Hua Shi's words, but he agreed to the proposal anyway. If this girl said so, then they might have a way to defeat this undead army.